Numb

It's beginning to seem like the same old hat. Another loss and another and another. 5 straight losses since my last post. Hiram, Anderson, Rose Hulman, Hanover, and Manchester. I'm not putting down our team but it's starting to get old. Same things happening every game with no change. We've had team meetings and discussions about what we need to change, what needs to be fixed in order for us to beat these teams. We know we're not a bad team. We have more talent on our team than half the other HCAC teams but we still manage to come out with another L in the loss column after each games. Opposing coaches tell us that we're a good team. Transylvania's coach called ours and said he doesn't know why we we're struggling so much and why we can't pull out wins. We gave his team the hardest game they'd played all year just like we'd done for Manchester at our home floor by taking them into overtime, but always the same outcome. A loss. I've heard coaches say that you learn in losing. Going undefeated all season and then heading into a tournament may not prove beneficial because if a team hasn't faced defeat and had to improve things, hasn't had to change things then they may get upset at the end of the season. 1 loss is ok, 2 losses, 3, 4, but now we're working our way up to 20 losses and it's hard not to get discouraged. It's hard not to hang your head after another loss and it's hard to believe we can win. I know we have the ability and the potential but I don't know if we've seen what our team is really made of this year or we've been able to put a run of plays or good basketball together to get key wins. ....

I started this post about 3 or 4 days ago and set it aside and thought I'd come back to it with some words of wisdom or something would spark my interest and get me writing again, but nothing did. We lost again on Saturday to Franklin and words can't describe the feeling when your team hits 20 losses on the season. I'm at that point where losing becomes numbing and the numbness begins to feel like an everyday occurrence. My friends and family are beginning to see the change in my personality and my passions. I'm changing and the numbness of losing and the team is a huge part of that. As this may be my last year of college basketball, I sit and wonder what has come out of this season. What have I learned if anything about playing basketball and with this team? Have I learned anything about myself? The truth is.. I don't know. It's something I need to think long and hard about because it may be the only way to pull something positive from such a season.